


Haunted

by Hellokaelyn



Category: NCIS
Genre: F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2019-01-08
Packaged: 2019-09-26 15:14:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17144117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hellokaelyn/pseuds/Hellokaelyn
Summary: A case triggers Nick but Ellie is there to pull him back.Now with Chapter 2 as the sequel.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For the Anon on Tumblr who requested it, I hope it at least partially lived up to your expectations! 
> 
> This took a darker turn then I planned it and is probably a bit of a mess

From the beginning of the case Nick knew it would be a bad one for him. 

He walked into the crime scene behind Ellie that morning trying to ignore the twisting in his gut. They had continued walking until reaching the upstairs bedroom where the bodies were. Angela Stanley the reason they got the call...and her seven year old daughter Vanessa Stanley. 

Nick didn’t even think about it as he asked Ellie if she wanted him to take the pictures, she looked as if she would be sick. Ellie had sent him a sad thankful smile as she left the room to look through the house for anything. Though as he started snapping pictures, he had to swallow down his own sick feeling but for a completely different reason then Ellie.

Every time he looked at the bodies in front of him, images of another mother and daughter kept appearing at the front of his mind and soon it all started blurring together. But he had to keep doing his job.

It wasn’t until Gibbs had sent him down to autopsy to see what Ellie had got from Jimmy that the twisting in his gut not only returned but was worse. Nick stood in the elevator and closed his eyes taking a few deep breaths.  _ Grow the hell up Torres. _

He stepped out of the elevator and past the sliding doors, stopping short. Ellie stood with her back facing him looking over Jimmy’s clipboard but his gaze was on the bodies. 

* * *

Ellie didn’t both turning around when she heard the doors slide open knowing it was Nick.

“Hey Nick, Jimmy stepped out for a few minutes but-”

Heavy quick breathing sounded behind her, stopping her mid sentence.

She spun around, dropping the clipboard as she did. 

Nick was hunched over, a hand clutching his chest as he struggled to breathe.

“Nick?!” Ellie quickly closed the distance. She swallowed her worry and panic, trying to keep her voice steady. “Nick can you hear me?” She ran over and grabbed the desk chair, bringing it over to Nick, lowering him into it carefully. 

* * *

_ Nick struggled to keep his mask in place as two guys from the group he was tasked to take down stood on either side of him. In front of them was a dark haired woman, tied up with tape over her mouth as she cried and struggled. His fists clenched. _

_ He looked up as the door swung open smacking into the wall. Randy King the leader and Nick’s number one target for his assignment walked in grinning. Nick’s jaw clenched. Fuck. _

* * *

Ellie crouched down in front of him, her hands on his knees. 

“Nick! I need you to relax and try to breath if you can hear me.”

* * *

 

_ “You’ve done well working with us so far Manuel, but now you must do what every one of my followers has accomplished.” King smirked walking over to the woman, running a finger down her cheek making her flinch away.  _

_ Nick felt sick to his stomach. No. No fucking way would he do this.  _

_ “Cmon Manny-” Said Marcus on his right, smacking a hand down on Nick’s shoulder. “This is the fun part.” _

_ Victor on his left whistled. “Hell if you won’t do it, I’ll take your place.”  _

_ King’s voice turned angry. “No one will be touching her but Manuel, leave boys NOW.”  _

_ Marcus and Victor huffed in annoyance before leaving, both giving Nick grins as they did.  _

_ Nick’s body tensed as King walked over to him.  _

_ “Don’t worry Manuel, she’s nothing but a whore anyway." _

_ His hands shook when King finally left the room.  _

* * *

“Nick-” Ellie but her hands on his face, chills going down her spine as his eyes opened but they looked empty to her.

He was still struggling to take in breaths which also made her uneasy.

“Come back to me, Nick.” She whispered, her voice breaking a little.

* * *

_ Nick knew from experience that the rooms in King’s building were sound proofed since he liked ‘maximum privacy’, and now Nick knew first hand what exactly went on behind closed doors. _

_ At least at this moment the soundproofing would work in his favor, if this wasn’t done right it could end both of their lives.  _

_ Before even thinking of stepping towards her, Nick raised his hands making sure the mask he held fell.  _

_ “We don’t have much time so I’m going to be straight with you, I’m not going to hurt you okay? If I could just let you walk out of here then I would but you won’t make it out those doors alive. If I make them think I did what they wanted, you have a chance.”  _

_ He didn’t really know for sure if she would make it out of this alive regardless, but he needed to calm her down. Nick knew though he’d do his damn hardest to make sure she walked out of here alive.  _

_ Nick slowly walked towards her, she had stopped crying and nodded her head along to what he was saying.  _

_ “I’m going to take the tape off your mouth, okay?” She frantically nodded, her eyes widening. “This might hurt a bit-” Nick went as careful as he could taking it off, muttering a ‘sorry’ when she flinched in pain.  _

_ “Thank you..” She whispered, her voice hoarse.  _

_ He tried smiling at her as he untied the rope around her legs and wrists.  _

_ “What’s your name?” Nick asked, keeping his voice soft.  _

_ She sniffed, rubbing her wrists. “Monica.” _

_ “Well Monica can I let you in on a little secret?”  _

_ “Y-Yes?” _

_ “My name is really Nick, not Manuel like they said.” _

_ Monica’s lips twitched in the corner. “You look more like a Nick.” _

_ Nick smiled a little.  _

_ “I’m sorry to do this Monica but we’re going to have to try and make it look at least a little realistic, luckily these guys aren’t the smartest.”  _

_ She nodded, looking nervous again. “Okay..” _

_ He found it a little weird that she seemed to have some trust in him, but he was going to use that as much as he could right now. Hopefully in the end that’d be what saved her. _

_ Nick spent the next few minutes apologizing as he had to rip some parts of her clothes, King would be suspicious if she still looked as put together as when he left. Monica desperate to just survive played along as she made sure her hair was tangled as if Nick pulled on it, her face still blotchy and wet from the crying she did which worked in their favor. _

_ King came in not long after, congratulating Nick on a job well done.  _

* * *

Nick’s body shook. Ellie let out a shuddering breath, she had to get him to come out of his memory. 

“It’s not real Nick.” Ellie said firmly, trying to make her voice strong. “It’s just a memory, it’s not real.”

* * *

_ As Nick ran up the steps to what looked like a house that hadn’t been used in years, he could hear words ringing in his ears, a voice familiar but he couldn’t place it. _

_ He rushed up the stairs to a bedroom, barely taking note that the house was lived in on the inside unlike what it appeared outside. Nick stopped short when he got to the bedroom, having to grip the wall to steady himself.  _

_ Monica lay on the floor, covered in blood. _

_ It was the sight next to her that had Nick almost falling over.  _

_ A little girl with her arm stretched towards Monica, covered in her own blood. _

_ “Like my handy work?” _

_ Nick’s head snapped up to look at King, sick grin in place.  _

_ “You...why the hell did you do this?!” Nick shouted.  _

_ King walked over, leaning forward to whisper in his ear. “Did you really think I’d buy your little stunt? I actually like you Manuel..so it was the whore and her daughter who had to pay the price.”  _

* * *

“Nick!” Ellie shouted as Nick’s eyes suddenly shut tightly, tears falling. A noise sounding like a whimper fell from his lips. She rested her forehead against his.

She couldn’t think of anything else but this-

* * *

_ Nick dropped to his knees beside Monica’s body the second King left, his laughter ringing in Nick’s ears. _

_ “I’m sorry..” He grabbed hold of her bloody hand. “I’m so sorry..” _

_ He leaned forward and cried. _

_ It was his fault Monica and her daughter were dead. _

* * *

Ellie closed the little distance between them, pressing her lips lightly against his.

Relief filled her when seconds later she felt his body relax.

She pulled away, her heart racing when she noticed his eyes were back to being open and no longer looked empty, there was a slightly haunted sad look but she would take that over what he looked like before. 

“Nick?” She whispered.

“Was I just dreaming?” He said lowly, a croak in his voice.

Ellie let out a relieved laugh, finally feeling like she herself could breath.

“No..I uh-”

Nick suddenly looked pained. “Ellie..I’m sorry you had to see that-”

“Don’t you dare say sorry, Nick.” She said sternly. 

He gave her a sad smile, his breathing still a little labored. 

“Can I...ask what happened?” Ellie asked softly. “You’ve been off all day.”

And then for the first time in the three years she’d known him, Nick started crying his eyes out. Ellie felt her own eyes water as she wrapped her arms around him.

Soon enough her own tears started falling as the story spilled out of him, if not a jumbled mess that she was lucky enough to understand. 

“Nick, eventually you need to stop thinking of it as your fault, King is the one who is responsible not you.” Ellie smoothed her thumb along the back of his neck, Nick seemed to melt into her. “You tried helping her the best you could-”

“I could have blown my cover, got her out of there the second we were alone-” 

“And then you’d both be dead!”

Nick was silent for a second, before words fell from his lips she barely heard but made her heart ache.

“Better me than her..” 

Ellie blinked trying not to cry. 

“Don’t say that!” 

“I’m a terrible person Ellie…”

She put her hands back on his face, forcing him to look at her. “You listen to me right now Nicholas Torres! You are  _ not _ a terrible person! How could I be in love with you if you were a terrible person?!”

Nick’s eyes widened. 

Ellie didn’t regret saying it out loud finally at all. 

“Which is why, when we get back to the bullpen, we’re telling everything to Gibbs and getting you some help, screw the tough guy act Nick.” Ellie stopped short for a minute. “On another note I have no idea where Jimmy ran off to..”

Nick looked defeated for a moment. “Okay..I’ll do it, on one condition.”

Ellie opened her mouth a little in shock. “Oh uh that was easier than I thought..what’s the condition?” 

“You say those words again.”

A laughed fell from her lips. “Nick, I love you.”

Finally a  _ real _ smile came to his face, his eyes looking more brighter. 

Ellie knew there’d be struggles along the way especially when Nick snapped back to trying to be the tough guy, but she wasn’t going anywhere. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things change for both Nick and Ellie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the Anon on Tumblr who requested a sequel to this fic ❤  
> May contain OOCness

“Uh-”

Ellie jumped away from Nick who still sat in the chair at the sound of Jimmy's voice. Neither of them even heard the autopsy doors open.

She felt her cheeks heat a little. They hadn't been doing anything but it probably looked like an odd scene. Her crouched down in front of Nick who sat in the chair, and both of them obviously had been crying. 

“Is..everything okay?” Jimmy had a wide eyed concerned look.

Ellie tried to smile reassuringly. “We're fine now Jimmy, um I think we're going to head up now.”

Jimmy opened his mouth but closed it. “O-Okay..I'm here if you guys need anything.”

Nick stood shakily with a little help from Ellie. He smiled a little in thanks but didn't say a word. Ellie mumbled a thanks to him as they walked to the doors. 

In the elevator Nick leaned against the wall, tilting his head back.

“Ellie? Do you uh..think you can tell Gibbs? I-”

He looked a little sick at the thought of repeating what he told her. Ellie grabbed his hand. 

“Of course, Nick.”

As the elevator opened to their floor Ellie removed her hand from his but kept a hand on his arm just in case. 

She sighed in relief seeing McGee wasn't at his desk, that way he didn't get suspicious when she asked Gibbs. 

Gibbs looked up as they walked to him, he frowned seeing their faces and how Nick looked a little out of it. 

“Conference room?” She whispered. Gibbs nodded, leading the way to the empty room. 

Right away Ellie directed Nick to a chair and poured him a cup of water. He wasted no time in drinking some, his hands still shaking.

“What the hell is going on?” Gibbs said, sounding agitated, or at least that's what she thought he sounded like. 

Ellie launched into it right away, Nick had seemed to space out sometime during but she figured that was probably for the best.

Gibbs kept a straight face on but his eyes gave away his anger and disgust towards King. 

When Ellie finished with what happened in autopsy, Gibbs looked at Nick.

“I'll call Grace.”

Nick finally looked at Gibbs, his body relaxing when he saw no disgust or anger towards him. “Thanks Gibbs.” He said in a rough voice. 

Gibbs placed a hand on his shoulder. “Nothing wrong with getting some help, Torres.”

* * *

Ellie had thought seeing Grace would make things better but it seemed digging deeper was only making things worse. 

It's what led them to where they are now.

Nick stood at the front of the conference room where McGee, Jimmy, Kasie, and Jack were gathered along with her and Gibbs. 

He was obviously uncomfortable as he talked, struggling as he told them about his undercover assignment, King, Monica, the Stanley case causing things to come back, and that he had been seeing Grace. 

“I'm glad you're talking to someone, Nick.” Jack said sincerely. “I know it isn't easy for some people to admit they need it and are actually willing to do something about it.” 

“We're all glad-” McGee said, Kasie and Jimmy nodding in agreement, it was obvious from Jimmy's face that he was remembering that day in autopsy. “-but why are you telling us or telling us now? I mean it's been obvious that you haven't been sleeping and Gibbs has been limiting your field work, but why now?” 

Ellie put a supporting hand on his arm. 

“Torres is taking a leave of absence.” Gibbs said for him. His glare making them stop from asking questions. “It's already been cleared by Vance.”

“Grace..suggested it, and I think I need some time away from the job.”

“In the meantime-” Gibbs turned towards Jack. “Vance wants you to lend more of a hand.”

Jack nodded, giving Nick a supportive smile. “Of course, for as long as you need me.” 

As Kasie and Jimmy started giving Nick their support, she couldn't help but think of how they came to this.

* * *

_ Ellie used the key Nick had given her to enter his apartment, calling his name as she walked in.  _

_ “Nick I'm back!” She shut the door behind her. “I got those new kind of chips that you like-” Ellie walked towards the kitchen. _

_ She stopped short. _

_ Nick stood in front of the counter, a plate of cut up apples on it. And a knife resting by the plate that his eyes were focused on. _

_ “Nick?” She said carefully, slowly placing the bags in her hand on the table.  _

_ He showed no reaction to her.  _

_ “Hey Nick?” She tried again, taking a step closer. _

_ His eyes were still glued to the knife. _

_ Ellie felt her stomach twist. “Can you hear me Nick?” She said gently.  _

_ Her eyes went right to his hand that started moving towards it.  _

_ She reacted without even thinking about it, reaching for the knife and taking it.  _

_ Nick flinched back, his head snapping towards her as he blinked in confused. _

_ “Hey Ellie, when did you get back?” _

_ Ellie swallowed the lump in her throat. “Just now..” _

_ Nick looked at the knife in her hand with a frown. “What's with the knife?” _

_ “Y-You were using it to cut up some apples.” _

_ He frowned, looking down at the plate in front of him. “I was?” _

_ She bit the inside of her cheek and nodded. He only shrugged and took the plate into the living room, eating an apple slice as he went.  _

_ “You wanna finish watching the Harry Potter movies?” He called from the living room. “I mean it was your idea to watch them all in the first place-” _

_ Ellie couldn't even think about Harry Potter at that moment but she didn't know how to even bring up what she had witnessed.  _

_ “Yeah sure!” She called back, somehow sounding normal. “I'll grab some snacks.”  _

_ “Thanks babe!” _

_ She couldn't help but smile a little at him calling her that.  _

_ Ellie tried to shake it off for now as she grabbed the snacks. _

_ But her eyes caught the knife block in the corner of the counter. Each knife had a certain slot it fit into...but none of them were in the right place. Ellie swallowed and glanced back towards the living room.  _

_ Her stomach became unsettled as she got a bad feeling in her gut. _

* * *

_ The next day Ellie had been successful in making up excuses to stay with Nick almost at all times. He hadn't noticed anything was up as he was happy to have her around, the tense feeling she had felt would disappear when he kissed her or wrapped his arms around her. _

_ Everything seemed normal. _

_ Until Nick had yawned and announced he was going to take a quick nap. Ellie knew he barely slept during the night so she had only gave him a quick kiss and thought nothing of it.  _

_ Two hours later she went in the bedroom to check on him. _

_ He was wrapped in the blankets on his side but awake. _

_ “How was your nap?” She asked softly, moving around the bed. “Ni-” _

_ Ellie felt that horrible feeling come back. _

_ Nick's eyes were open and he was blinking, but his eyes looked empty as he stared straight at the wall. _

_ “Nick?” She whispered, her voice cracking. Ellie crouched down so she was eye level with him.  _

_ There was nothing. _

_ She quickly left the room just in time as a tear fell.  _

_ Her hands shook as she sent Gibbs a text. _

_ It only took him minutes before she was letting him into the apartment.  _

_ “He's in the bedroom.” She whispered, arms wrapped around herself.  _

_ Gibbs gave her shoulder a squeeze before moving towards the room. Ellie only glanced in to see Gibbs in the same position she had been in, his lips moving as he tried talking to Nick who didn't respond. _

_ “Gibbs..” She said shakily when he came back out shaking his head. “I..yesterday I came in to find him staring at a knife, he was just completely blanked out and only snapped out of it when I took the knife..then I noticed every knife in the knife block had been moved around, half of them never even get used.”  _

_ Gibbs’ worry became obvious on his face now. “You go sit with him, I'm getting Grace over here.” He clenched his jaw. “Something different needs to be done.” _

_ Ellie nodded with a sniffle. “Instead of getting better he's only getting worse..I'm-” a small sob escaped. “I'm scared for him Gibbs.” _

_ Gibbs pulled her into a hug, Ellie sunk into it.  _

_ She just wanted him to be okay.  _

* * *

She slid her hand into Nick's as Kasie pulled him into a conversation before they left, obviously trying to take his mind off it.

After that day, Grace had made sure she rescheduled any appointments for the next day and spent the whole day with Nick to focus on  _ him _ . 

Grace had then called Ellie and Gibbs into her office. She was recommending Nick take a leave of absence, he needed time away from the job, the thing that was the reason he even had experienced what he had. Gibbs had right away agreed, they would both talk with Vance in the morning. 

* * *

_ “Okay so he's taking a leave of absence but I need to know what's really going on, it's more than just the King and Stanley cases isn't it?” Ellie said, a little frustration seeping through.  _

_ Grace smiled sympathetically. “Having his panic attack and having the memories of the King case be triggered, you can say it opened the gate to all the other horrible things he had seen or done while undercover, even things from his childhood that he had buried deep. His head is now flooded with all his bad memories, which is why he will blank out at times.” _

_ Ellie blinked back tears. “H-He's going to be okay, right?” _

_ She needed him to be. He was everything to her, had been before this all even happened. And he was finally hers and she his, it hurt to think they could lose it already. _

_ “I believe he will be, but he needs distance from the job, some time to just breathe you can say.” _

_ “A-And..me?” She couldn't help but say in a small voice. Gibbs placed a hand tightly on her shoulder. _

_ Grace shook her head. “ Just as long as you don't talk about work, I actually recommend you spend as much time with him as you want. Nick told me himself that he feels better when you're with him.” _

_ Ellie let out a breath of relief.  _

* * *

A month had past since Nick's leave. 

They were eating dinner with McGee and Delilah that night, and Ellie couldn't take her eyes off him as he sat on the couch with Morgan on one leg and Johnny on the other. The twins were babbling to him about who knows what, only some words clear. But Nick smiled and talked back to them as if he understood every word. 

His smile was becoming more common and free of pain every day that passed. Taking a break from the job seemed to be the medicine he needed. 

“He looks better.” McGee said, coming to stand beside her as she leaned against the doorway. 

Ellie smiled softly. “He does. He hasn't had any blank outs since his leave.”

“That's good.” McGee smiled too. “But I can't help but think..is it possible he will even come back? I never thought of him being happy not chasing down bad guys but..he seems fine without the thing that he loved so much.” 

Ellie watched Nick playfully tickle the twins, their giggles echoing through the house. Delilah shouting that he better not make them pee themselves from the kitchen. 

“Honestly...I can't even tell you if he's coming back or not but to tell you the truth, I..I'm not sure I'd even want him to.” She admitted, keeping her voice low so there was no chance of him hearing. 

McGee looked at her surprised. “Why?”

She sighed. “What if..he gets better but going back undoes all the progress?”

“True..I can see why you're worried. But you aren't going to try and stop him if he wants to right?”

She shook her head. “No. And if he doesn't want to come back I-” She turned to face McGee. “McGee..if Nick doesn't come back to work, I'm not staying.”

He stated at her in shock. “What? Bishop you love being an agent.”

She smiled sadly. “Yes but I love Nick more. This job caused him so much pain, and as much as it gave him too, I don't know if I'd be able to stay knowing I might say something or something might happen to me that triggers anything again.”

“Does Nick know you're leaving if he doesn't come back?”

Ellie nodded. “He tried talking me out of it but..I want a future with him, and I'm alright with a normal boring one because all I need is him to be happy.” 

McGee pulled her into a hug. “It won't be the same without you two-” He chuckled. “Poor Gibbs is going to have to deal with new agents again.” He pulled away from the hug to stare at her. “Wait..does Gibbs know?”

“Yeah, he wasn't thrilled but I could tell he understood.” She gave McGee a smile. 

He smiled sadly. “Seems like everyone is leaving lately.” 

She shared his look. But she knew he wouldn't be a field agent long, it was the way he looked when missing moments with the twins or the look on his face when a case got to him more now that he was a parent. And Gibbs only had so long to go before he had to retire, they would all be gone sooner or later. She had even heard rumblings of McGee someday taking over Cyber Crimes especially with their lead retiring soon. 

They would all be going their separate ways..but Ellie knew in her heart that they would always be family and keep in touch.

* * *

Ellie sat on the couch curled into Nick's side, feeling as if she would fall asleep any moment when Nick spoke.

“I made up my mind.”

She sat up, blinking the sleep away. “What?”

“About if I'm going back to NCIS or not.”

Ellie felt a little surprise. She had expected him to take longer. “And?”

Nick turned so he was facing her. “Ellie..I'm not going back. Honestly I never could picture myself not chasing bad guys and kicking down doors but with everything and taking this leave..it showed me I could live without the rush and thrill of the job.” He grabbed her hands. “But Ellie, you don't have to leave just because of me-”

“Nick.” She got up and moved to sit on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. “I'm leaving because I  _ want _ that normal life with you, and yes I'm worried that something might happen that makes your progress go back but..I had my time as an agent and while it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life, living in a house with you and possible little rugrats running around is what I want, and we both know being an agent can make that hard.” 

Nick smiled at her rugrats comment. “I want that with you too..”

“So...we're leaving NCIS.”

“Yeah..” Nick said. “Yeah we are.”

“Onto the next chapter of our lives..” 

Nick grinned and stood still holding onto her. Ellie let out a squeak of shock, wrapping her legs around his waist to keep from maybe falling. 

She felt her mouth go dry and a curling in her stomach at the look in his eyes.

They hadn't taken the next step in their relationship as they were both focused on him getting better, but god did they both want to.

Ellie tightened her legs around him, her fingers gripping his hair as she crashed her lips to his. Nick groaned against her, eagerly returning the kiss filled with all the built up tension.

“Bedroom?” He breathed out.

She nodded quickly. 

As Nick took her into the bedroom..the next chapter of their lives was created. 


End file.
